naughty adult sms

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A General asks a young lady officer, how she felt in Services?
Lady: Very fine, whole day passes in saying Yes Sir, Yes Sir & the whole night in No Sir, No Sir!

INDIA KI REET... Ladki agar apni marzi se de de to PYAAR... Agar Dost Dilwaye to UPHAR... Ghar wale dilwaye to SANSKAR... aur agar apne aap lele to... BaLaTkAar...

friends talking about AIDS
Friend: Kabhi condom ke bina nahin karta. Santa: Ungli mein bhi condom pehnta hoon.
Banta: Main to bilku risk nahin leta, padosi se karwata hoon.

School mein bachche ke papa ne teacher se kaha: Madam ji thodi aap koshish karo, thodi hum karte hain, bachcha to nikal hi jayega...!

Ek bus mein ladko aur ladkiyo ki team bani antakshari khelne ke liye.
Girls: Hum tumko harakar dikhayenge..
Boys: Hum haar gaye, chalo ab dikhao.

Girl: Will you love me after marriage also?
Boy: This depends on your husband, if he allows me.

When a man talks dirty 2 a women, its sexual harassment,
when a women talks dirty 2 a man, its $$$ per minute!

He came 2 me 1 nite
explored my body
licked
sucked
swallowed
& had his fill
wen satisfied he left...
I was hurt...
F***IN MOSQUITO
U Dirty Mind

A Short thing
It gets Longer
when U hold it
N pass between
women Breasts
N enters into
A hole
What is it?
1 min 2 think!
Car Seat Belt
U dirty mind. :P:Plolz

A baby dog asks mama dog: How papa looks like. Mama dog said: "Your dad came from behind, I do not have the chance to see its face carefully!"

Do you like mathematics? If so, add a bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and we can multiply!

A man had "I LOVE YOU" tattooed on his dick. He went home and proudly showed his wife. "There you go again, trying to put words into my mouth", she said:P

In a bar 1 Guy says 2 another
"I slept wid ur mom last nite"
D whole bar was waiting 4 d other Guy's response.
He laughs & says, "Lets go home dad, U r drunk"

Sali: Jija ji 500 rs. dedo, agley hafte doongi...
Jija: 1500 lele par abhi de......lolz

(_,_)2 stay
(') Young
// +SEXY
(,))
) ' (
(_,_)DO
(,))
) ' (
(_,_)THiS
//
(,))

) ' (
(_,_)MÖre
(,))
(_,_)
(')'; OFTEN
// ';
(,)) '
:P:P

Teacher: Name some films that have almost same stories?
Pappu: Madam, Blue films.
:P:Phehehe

One day there was this naked man and elephant, the elephant looks at the naked man for a few seconds, ask the naked man, "HOW CAN YOU BREATH THROUGH THAT LITTLE THING?":Plolz

Q: Whats the difference between a computer and a woman?
A: A computer doesn't laugh at a 3½ inch floppy.

Hair oil ki ad mein hair dikhate hain, Skin cream ki ad mein Skin, Toothpaste me Teeth, Footwears me Feet, par WHISPER ki ad mein kuch nahi dikhate????
Jaago Grahak Jaago :P:P

A lady from 2nd floor asking a bananawala: Kaise diye?
Bananawala: Memsaab Aath mein Bara.
Lady: Saat mein Tera deta hai to oopar aaja.

Daughter: Mom, kya yeh sach hai ki ladke jahan apna l*nd dalte hain, bachha wahin se nikalta hai?
Mom: Haan.
Daughter: Oh my god! To kya mera bachha mere muh se niklega?:P:Plolz

Jad aapji da janam hoya te tusi nange si te cheekan maar rahe si,
te hun jad tusi nange hunde ho te koi hor cheekan marda hai.
Sab time-time di gal hai!
:P:P